Specifically, it's of an effete fashionista, wearing guyliner and too much cologne, flapping around the floors of a department store on the search for the most “amazeball” silk pocket square to match my eyes.

This is a service I shall never use, regardless of how much free fizz is on offer. But an online stylist that selects only the finest contemporary fashion to match my personal tastes? Now that I could get used to, especially if a trunk of those items are sent to me free of charge; they collect anything I don’t want and I just pay for what I fancy.

That, in a nutshell, is what Enclothed offers. And unlike some of its competitors, you don’t have to spend hours filling in your personal preferences. Instead, you click on images of models you’d like to look like, and they take things from there.

I said David Gandy. They said: “We’re not that good.”

Enclothed is exclusively offering the first 100 Square Mile readers to sign up to the service and order a box, a pair of luxurious Johnstons of Elgin cashmere ribbed socks in colour of the season, Ruby, worth £39.95. To redeem the offer, enter the code SQUAREWIN when you sign up on enclothed.co.uk.